It is the soul that matters

Monday, August 29, 2005

What would I do without you?


I need you in every step that I take,
I want you in every decision that I make
I want you to just walk besides me,
Holding my hands very tightly.

The trust that I see in your eyes now,
I want to see that always,
The love that I get from you now,
I want to get that always.

This thought keeps racing in my mind,
What would I have done without you?
I would not have been myself,
Had I lived my life without you.

Its only with you that I
feel secure and protected,
Its just your love dear
that I never suspected.

I love you
I love you with all my heart
Will always love you
Until from me, my life departs







Posted by Nats :: Monday, August 29, 2005 :: 1 comments

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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

My Personality



Your #1 Match: ISFJ


The Nurturer
You have a strong need to belong, and you very loyal.A good listener, you excell at helping others in practical ways.In your spare time, you enjoy engaging your senses through art, cooking, and music.You find it easy to be devoted to one person, who you do special things for.
You would make a good interior designer, chef, or child psychologist.

What's" Your Personality Type?

Posted by Nats :: Wednesday, August 24, 2005 :: 0 comments

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Driving and me


Three 12 year old kids were pedaling their cycles at around 10 in the night. Two boys and one girl. They saw a truck coming from the opposite direction. The first boy lost his balance and fell badly. He was quite ahead of the other two. The second boy too fell in a puddle a few meters behind the first boy. The girl was far behind from them, but she screamed and she fell too. She didn’t know why she fell. There was no reason for her to fall. The truck had gone, there was no puddle, and still she fell. The boys forgot about their injuries and burst out laughing. She said she got scared and since both of them fell, she also fell. Such a stupid reason…………. And all started laughing.

That shy and scared girl is me. I was always scared of cycling. I had never taken my cycle to the main road, and used to cycle only in the lanes. And that too, only when my bhaiya or papa used to be around.

Now, at the age of 23, I am still scared of cycling. I can never sit in the front seat of a two wheeler. But I always wanted to drive a four wheeler, a car. This was not a very great wish of mine. Just wanted to try it. I got a chance. I got keys of a friend’s car. I was very excited about driving the car. I wanted to put my hands on the steering.

I went and sat on the driver’s seat. But I didn’t know what to do after that. I didn’t know which is the clutch, which is the break and which is the accelerator. I didn’t know anything about changing the gears, when they should be changed, about the hand break. In short, I knew nothing, not even some of the terms. He told me everything. He gave me the theoretical knowledge about driving a car. Now I knew when and how the gears had to be changed, when to use the hand break, clutch, leg break and everything. Since I was interested, I learnt everything very fast. Since his car is new and he is possessive about it, he didn’t allow me to drive it. Obviously, no body would do that.

I then decided to join a driving school. I still have to do that. I have not approached any driving school.

Later once I went to meet another friend. His car is pretty old. He was driving and the road was empty. I told him that I wished to drive it. He immediately agreed. I went and sat on the driver’s seat. I DROVE. I drove the car for about 4 meters. Ya, I know that’s not great, but for me, it is. Later he took the car to another empty road where I drove for about 100 meters. I drove it in the first gear only, but it was fun. I drove a car. wow. It made me feel so happy. I started the car properly, drove straight……….Ya, my friend had kept his hand on the steering, but still………He kept encouraging me that I was driving properly. He told me when to change the gear. I drove on second gear just for 3-4 meters, then returned to first gear. It was all so exciting. But I couldn’t manage to stop the car properly. It jerked a little before it could stop finally.

But all in all, it was fun. I enjoyed. I thanked my friend and left. I have now decided to learn driving…soon, very soon.

Posted by Nats :: Wednesday, August 24, 2005 :: 0 comments

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Monday, August 22, 2005

Suchitra

Saw the movie Black. How beautifully it has shown the teacher student relationship. Awesome. That reminds me of girl called Suchitra. She is a dumb and deaf girl. She was my mother's student. My mom is a teacher.
A tall and healthy girl, wearing a long skirt and a loose top stood in front of me. I just couldn't help noticing her heavy body. Actually, I was a little scared of her huge body. I also noticed that she walked like drunk person and her left hip was noticiably bigger than the right one.
"This is Suchitra.", said my mother. She was introducing me to her. Then I saw something which was so attractive, so magnetic. I saw her smiling. Wow. She smiled like a two year old. Her smile looked so pure, so innocent, so relaxing. Her face said it all that she has no worries, no botherations and is not concerned about the outside world. She was happy in her own shell. When my mother introduced me to her, like a very well mannered child, she brought her hand forward and shook hands with me. I was touched. She was so happy and so excited to see me. Honestly speaking, it wasn't the same with me. I was a little reluctant to talk to her, or maybe I didn't know how to do that. My mother noticed it. She didn't like it, and took her away.
My mother used to talk about her at home. She was a 17 year old girl then. None of the normal school would give her admission and would ask her parents to take her to some special school. They had tried that before, but Suchitra had not liked it there. She wanted to study with normal students, and finally they managed to convince the principal of the school, where my mother used to teach. She was admitted in Class I. My mother was her class teacher. She had never taught such special students before, but wanted to try. She was succeeding in the same. Suchitra was so happy with her new teacher that her parents approached my mother for private tutions as well. My mother was unwilling in the start, but later agreed.
Now, my mother started teaching her everyday, in school, as well as at home. "Kabbta, Kabbta", she used to call my mother (her name is Kavita). My mother did not know the sign language, and learnt it from Suchitra's mother. Initially she needed her mother's help to convey something, but later could do it herself. My mother used to explain things to her with the help of her fingers and her eyes. Suchitra knew a little bit of lip reading too.
Suchitra was a very good and obedient student. This is the reason why my mother liked teaching her. She loved studying, but was a very slow learner. My mother used to get irritated at times, but she didn't give up. She taught her subjects like Maths, Environmental Studies, English, and Art. I had seen her drawings. They were like any other student in class I.
Although, it took her two years to get promoted to class II, Suchitra, her parents, my mother, none of them lost hope. They knew she could do it. My mother taught her till she passed Class III, but could not continue after that. It was because we were shifting to a different city. She and her parents were very sad. They didn't want to lose such a good teacher, but couldn't help the situation.
Suchitra, later finished her studies till class V, but couldn't study after that. It was becoming very difficult for her. Then her parents put her in slow learners school, and she has now managed to pass Class X at the age of 25. Her studies included some special subjects like art.
My mother is happy with her accomplishment. Suchitra will always have a special place in her heart. She will always be special to her teacher, and am sure that this teacher will be special to Suchitra and her parents as well.
Hats off to Suchitra, her parents, and my mother....................

Posted by Nats :: Monday, August 22, 2005 :: 2 comments

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Tuesday, August 02, 2005

26th, the terror.....................................

26th of July- It seemed like a normal day when I woke up that morning. I left for office. I was busy with my office work. Somewhere in the afternoon, I decided to take a break and move out. It was raining very heavily then. I couldn't even manage to go across the road. The torrential rains were accompanied with ferocious winds. So, i decided to go back to the office.

I love the rains. Like a kid, I wanted to get wet in the rains. I thought I will enjoy the rains in the evening while going back home. But I realized it later, I just couldn't go home that evening. The roads were all flooded and there was no way I could have reached home. So I decided to spend the night in the office, which I did. 70% of the staff stayed in the office that night. We surfed and found out that this was all because of high tide and heavy rains occuring simultaneously. Heavy rains were forecasted for the next two days also.

Next morning, I and a friend took a public bus and reached home with no problem. There was no water, no electricity at home. Phones were not working. There was no mineral water available in the shops. Later that evening, electricity resumed. The first thing I did was to switch on the TV and started a news channel. Only then did I realize how bad the situation was. People were dying. There was so much damage occuring to their houses, their belongings, their loved ones.

"Landslides kill many." "People washed away in the forceful water." "Many electrocuted." "Many missing." "Houses washed away." "Many die in their cars because of suffocation." These were the kind of news, which we got to hear. It was all so so scary. People had seen dead bodies floating in water. Many saw the lower level of their buildings fully washed away.

My fast paced Mumbai had suddenly come to a standstill. Mumbaikars were never frightened of the rains. But now, they were. They were not ready to move out of their houses. Fear could be seen on the faces of fearless Mumbaikars. But their spirit was still noteworthy. They helped whomever and however they could. Many were stuck in traffic for hours together without any food and water. Local residents helped them with buscuits, some snacks and water. Many saved lives. Hats off to my Mumbai...................

Its been a week now and the situation has still not improved for many. Many places still don't have any electricity, water, or food. They are blaming the government saying that they are not providing them with any help. But people are trying to help others in whatever possible way.

"I love the rains. I love the rains. I love the rains." I used to say this always. But now I ask myself "Do I still love the rains?", which has taken life of so many fellow beings..................

Posted by Nats :: Tuesday, August 02, 2005 :: 0 comments

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