It is the soul that matters

Pagalpan

2008-07-08T12:15:00.001+04:00

Scene:
§ Husband watching TV
§ Some girl dancing on TV
§ Wife getting irritated on husband

Wife: Kuch kaam nahi hota tuumse. Bass yehi sab dekhte raho….ye to vohi baat hui na…ghar ki daal bhati nahi…bahar ki murgi bahut pasand aati hai…

Husband: Ye kya laga rakha hai tuumne subah subah?

Wife: Vohi to…subah subah AASTHA, SANSKAAR, aise sab channels lagane chahiye. Un mahatmaon ka aashirwaad lena chahiye. Aur tuum ho ki inn aadhi nangi ladkiyon ko dekhte rehte ho. Ye kya MTV laga ke baithe ho.

Husband: (Looks toward audience): Off fo! Isski ye bak bak to band hoti nahi. Par isska ilaaj hai mere paas.

Gets up from his place, picks up Khujli baba used ear bud and sits back on his seat.

Husband: Ye Khujli baba used ear bud badi kaam ki cheez hai. Awaz filter kar deti hai. Jiske awaz nahi suunni uske saamne iska 1 used part dikhao. Fir Khujli baba ka use kiya hua ear bud apne kaan mein dalo aur bass….CHAMATKAAR!

He can no longer hear what his wife is saying and enjoys what he sees on TV.

A weird dream

2008-06-27T13:31:00.001+04:00

A weird dream, but an enjoyable one:
I saw that I was walking back home. On my way, I met Dimple Kapadia. We started talking. It seemed as if she had already known me from before. She invited me home. I readily agreed.
We walked for 5 minutes before we reached her place. I had expected her house to be a big luxurious one, but to my surprise, it was a small 1 bedroom-hall apartment. The sofa sets (Yes, there were two-three sofa sets) occupied a lot of space in the living room and there was very little moving space.
When I entered in, I saw some people sitting while many others were entering. I recognized two girls. They were my school friends. Within a second, we were sitting together and enquiring about each other’s where-about.
They were all there for a reason which I was unaware of. There was an auditorium just behind Dimple Kapadia’s house. A play was going to start there in a short while. Dimple Kapadia invited me for the play. I obviously couldn’t say a No. I called up home and informed my mom that I would be late.
Then we proceeded to her back yard. Wow, what a beautiful sight it was! A beautiful garden with almost all types of flowers there. With all the love I have for botany, I couldn’t name any of the flowers. There was white, pink, purple, yellow, red, orange, blue, and many more.
Later we moved to the auditorium. It was very huge. It was more like a castle, made up of POP. It looked very different and beautiful, but a scary one too.
The play started. Now, I have forgotten what it was about. I just remember that when the play reached its climax, I had this urgent nature’s call. When I told this to my friend, she said she was in the same situation and agreed to join me.
We left the auditorium in search of a rest room. It took us some time to find one, thanks to the huge exteriors of the auditorium. After we were done, we realized that we had lost our way and didn’t know the way back to the auditorium.
Both of us were really scared. We started our search for the auditorium gate. Finally, when we reached the auditorium, it was empty. There was no body there. We were shocked. Both of us were not wearing watches and didn’t know how much time it took us to get back to the auditorium. When we looked at the auditorium watch, it showed us 10 pm. We had left that place at around 8 pm. What we thought were few minutes were actually two hours. The gate to the exit was latched from outside. We were stuck inside.
“Cuckoo-Cuckoo” buzzed the alarm. It was 6am and I had to wake up.

Train Travel

2008-02-12T11:25:00.000+04:00

Thanks to Shrads posts, I am writing after such a long time. What to write about…She writes about observing people and things around her. That reminded me of an observation, I had promised myself I would write about.
It’s about a train travel.
From the time I entered the ladies compartment of a Borivli bound local, I kept observing this girl and her mother. The girl would be in he late teens. I had never seen her before but she seemed so familiar.
The kind of conversation they were having brought a smile to my face. Nothing specific. They were talking about their day’s activities and were making plans for dinner. But I kept looking at the girl’s face. She always had that saintly smile on her face. She looked so content and so happy with her simple life. That’s why she seemed familiar.
She reminded me of “ME,” when I was a teenager. I remember when people used to tell me that they see me wearing that beautiful smile always. I never used to get frustrated or furious on anyone or anything. I used to look so cool and content at that time. I used to talk with my mom for hours together.
Things have changed over the years. Now, a small reason is enough to irritate me. Not that I wasn’t moody before, but had good control on my moods. But now, I am a slave of my moods. And those long chats with mom, gone…gone away. Its just small talks now.
Life takes away so many beautiful tings from you. Maybe getting into the real world has been really expensive to me. Life does not give me time for all that I love to do. Its so much of a TIMETABLE.
So, 1 message for that cute girl, whose face I just cannot forget. Don’t lose your innocence. You look very beautiful with that smile on your face. And message to her mom – Keep talking to daughter always, however busy life makes you or her.
And one message for myself: Enough of these LIFE excuses. I can still do all that makes me happy. I can still wear that smile always. I always keep telling myself. Happiness comes from within. And this motivating sentence does a wonderful job. And I feel I am a teenager again. Yes, you will see me smile the next time you meet me.

Phone story

2007-08-24T22:44:00.000+04:00

Lost my phone recently. Not lost…actually it got stolen. I was busy talking with my friend, when I noticed a small girl fidget with my bag. But it was only later that I realized that she had flicked away the first ever pricey gadget possessed by me. It happened at Bandra, near Elco market.
I realized after 5 minutes that my phone was missing. Went to the same spot again, tried spotting the girl, asked some of the localites, but all in vain. Even if they pretended to help, they were of no help. Asked one of them the way to Bandra police station.
Headed there with my friend. Got a chance to speak to some junior inspector. Told him about the incident. Instantly came the reply, “Take a certificate from us, contact your service provider; you will get the same number on a different handset.” God! Felt like slapping him then and there. He suggested talking to some senior inspector. We went and sat across him. That inspector was busy doing some paper work, and for a long time pretended as if we were invisible. Later he got a little courteous, looked up and said “don mint haan”. With a smile on our face and composure maintained, we said “Theek hai”. Some more time passed and we were staring at one other inspector, who was busy beating up someone who looked like a thief. A little scared, we again started looking at the inspector across our table.
Finally, the inspector kept his papers on one side, closed his pen with the cap, and looked towards us. We told him about the entire incident. With a little sympathy on his face, he said “Yes, they do this way only. You should be more careful. (OK, I don’t need your lecture, I want my phone. I know it was my mistake as well. But it’s not usual for me to keep losing phones. You find mine, I promise, I will be careful henceforth.) Don’t worry, I will send one detection team over there, for the time being take the certificate and get your number back.”
Movies experience helped us then (Not to take panga with a police officer). Still maintaining that smile, we said “OK”, took the certificate from there and moved out.
How disgusting. It’s just a phone. They can’t find it. Obviously, it’s their area and they know who stole the phone. The localites told us that those girls keep roaming over there only. But I am sure, their team didn’t take any pains to search it.
Just a certificate works…Is that what the police is for? Just providing certificates. Or, is it that they get their share. Hmm…5 minutes from the police station, those girls keep roaming there always; still the police do not catch them. It is understood. They get their share.
But people like me suffer a lot for being careless once. True, every second matters. People in Mumbai have to be cautious every passing second. Who knows what can happen the next second.

am tagged...

2007-06-14T21:57:00.000+04:00

Alrighty! I am part of the game now. I have been tagged by a sweet little girl (Oops, sorry Shrads).
I have to write my 8 quirks.

STEP 1: Shrad’s Rules
~Start with eight random facts/habits about yourself
~Post these eight quirks on your blog and also post these rules along with them
~At the end of the post.. type in the names of the lucky (eh?) eight who get tagged by you and take this chain forward!

STEP 2: My top eight quirks

I hate the time when night just sets in. It’s neither bright nor completely dark, but more dark than bright. I don’t know why but I hate to be outdoors at that time.
I just can’t tolerate to see women smoking. Weird, I know that it’s ok if I see boys smoking, but girls, I feel like giving them “one tight slap”.
I love to dream. I am always in my own world. I am my best company.
I once tried riding my brother’s TVS Victor…and *dhad* I gifted one uncle a beautiful dent in his new Wagon R. Since then, whenever I sit as a pillion with my brother, I keep imagining, if I were driving now, I would go *dhad* in the car in front, I would go *dhad* in that tree…and all vehicles…and I would be in at least 150--200 pieces when I reach home.
I can’t cook and keep the kitchen clean at the same time. I tried, but somehow the food is tastier when I am only cooking and not bothering about the cleanliness (please see: but the food is not by any chance unhygienic).
I never miss a chance to take a look at myself when I see a mirror.
I have this weird habit of scratching my nose very often. I don’t even realize it, but I get the scratching sensation very often.
I love to keep lots of stationary with me. Pens, pencils, erasers, rulers, sharpeners, stickers. Everyone would hate this, but I would love it if someone gifts me a pen.

STEP 3: Now, three people who get tagged by me

http://dancingpigs.vox.com
http://liveanidea.blogspot.com/
http://www.mysticarni.blogspot.com/

me nostalgic...

2007-05-08T20:53:00.000+04:00

Just getting nostalgic…nothing specific and no one special…but everything seems special and everyone seems so special…just wish could see them some day…some where in our busy lives.

Met an old friend the other day, rather an acquaintance…a batch mate…But I was so glad to see her. She got married, like many of her class mates. Man, realized then that we are growing old. Life has told us “Welcome to life” long back, but may be we or I still haven’t comprehended it. That feeling is still to sink in. I have grown up. Parents say its time to get married, to go to another house, to take life seriously, to change life completely. I ask myself if I am ready. Sometimes I get “Yes” as an answer, sometimes “No”. Sometimes I feel I am still a 7 year old who loves to sit in the swing, to slide down the slider, to take life as it comes, to just live life carefree, who still loves to get wet in the rain, who likes to sit in the baggi, who loves talking to ma about the days happenings, who just loves chit chatting about nothing with her friends. At other times I feel, ok…I have grown up…I am ready to take care of a family, ready to behave matured, ready to talk sense always.

But, to all people who would be a part of my “grown up” life, listen; I always love to be a kid, to be treated like a kid, to be carefree like a kid.

Hospital story

2007-04-22T21:24:00.000+04:00

"Kona sathi bari hou mee?" (For whom do I get better?), cried a 90 year old lady on her hospital bed. I was on the bed next to hers recuperating from a fractured arm. The old lady would repeat this sentence many times a day and the lady sitting next to her bed, would get up and hug her. "Why do you say this aai? I am right here for you." But the old lady would give it a deaf ear and continue to cry.

Puzzled, I always used to think when her daughter is sitting next to her, why does she always cry saying For whom do I get better. I am not very good with Marathi. My mother who is very fluent in Marathi asked the young lady for clarification. She said that she was not her daughter but only a paid nurse. It was my first day in the hospital and the old lady had spent close to 15 days there. I learnt from the nurse that she was suffering from a kidney problem, and was giving a positive response from the medicines she ate. But the lady wasn’t happy from within. The nurse said the lady was blessed with 4 children, but now, when she needs them the most, no one was near her.

The nurse, Asha, used to feel very bad and sad for the lady. She once said “I know her since many years. She and her husband worked very hard for good upbringing of their four children. Reshma was the eldest. Then Vinay, Seema and Ajay, the youngest. Reshma passed away when she was only 21. I had seen this lady then. She was shattered, but soon realized that life has to go on and she had to take care of her other 3 kids… You know how difficult it is for any mother to see her young child pass away in front of her eyes. She was very keen to send both her sons abroad. Parents then, used to feel that if their child is in the USA, they are settled. And she was one of them. Or maybe she just wanted them to earn well and live lavishly and not see the poor days that she had seen in her life. She used to say it with pride that both her sons are in the United States of America. She got Seema married in a very nice, rich house. She is so happy there. But she is not happy with her mother because she has transferred her flat to both her sons only. Maybe she was wrong in doing that. or maybe Seema didn’t deserve it….”

It seemed like she was saying something but suddenly stopped. After a little pause, she continued. “And now, when the same mother needs them the most, no one is there by her side. What does she ask for? Just few sweet words. What does she long for? Just for their touch. And they cannot give her even that. Now also, she blames herself only. She tells me - it’s my fault. Why do you blame them? I sent them abroad. Now work is also important na. They can’t leave their work for me, can they? And I say – why can’t they? They can and they should. You are their mother. You need them... But whenever I say something against them, she would give it a deaf ear. See this is a mother. I feel so bad for her.

Her sons sent me the money to buy a mobile phone. They keep calling up every other day to find her status. What do I tell them? I have told them a lot many times that it’s you that she needs and no medicines and they keep telling me, O Asha we are not getting any leaves. We are trying… Now you need permission to meet your mother also.

Sometimes, I feel she should die.” Saying this, Asha started crying.

I didn’t know how to react. I had my mother to nurse me 24*7. I just hugged her felt thankful that she was there for me. Right then, I made up my mind I would always be there for my mother.

Later some time I asked my mother, “If Asha says the old lady is not upset with her kids, why does she keep screaming Kona sathi bari hou mee? Why does she always keep crying?”
My mother just smiled and said “Beta, she says that in her subconscious state. That is what she feels now. She is unhappy from within. But she feels she cannot express her feelings in front of anyone. Maybe not even in front of her kids. So, whatever she can’t say in her conscious state comes out in her subconscious state and she doesn’t even realize that. At present she just needs her kids by her side.”

“But, don’t you think this old lady was wrong in not giving anything to her daughter? As Asha said, she has given her property only to her sons. She didn’t give anything to her daughter.”
“Well, I can’t comment on that. What came in her mind, I cannot be sure of. I do not even know what consequences led to this.”

I was there in the hospital for 5 days. I used to see her wet eyes waiting to see her kids. And in ‘subconscious’ state, as mummy said she would say lots. “Konasathi bari hou mee? Konn aahe majha? Yeshu mala ney….Mala ney yeshu. (For whom do I get better? Who is there for me? Take me away, O Christ, take me away.)”

Don’t know whom to blame here. The mother who sent her kids abroad and was unfair to her daughter, the kids who couldn’t remove time to come to see their ailing mother, their jobs (if at all they wanted to come but were helpless), or just her old age. Whatever it be, but it was an altogether new experience for me. I met one other side of life there.

2007-04-20T23:41:00.000+04:00

Kitni hulchul, kitna bhagambhag
hai iss ilake ki sada pe,

Par akela sa mera mann,
jaise registan ki banjar mein,

Kabhi uthta hai ek tufan sa,
jaise tsunami ki lehron mein,

Kabhi shant ho jata hai sab kuch,
jaise mritkon ke chehron pe

Chalte hue tere saath...

2007-02-20T10:40:00.000+04:00

Hari si chadar oddhe iss raste par
Apne kadmon ko tumhare saath milate hue
Ghanton tak tumhare saath chalna chahti hun
Hamare dilon ke taal milate hue

Taazgi hamari aankhon ko chuti hui
Halki hawaen patton se khelti hui
Hariali basanti khushbu faila rahi hai
Komal dharti hamare kadam chumti hui

Tumhari iss khamoshi ko mehsoos karte hue
Tumhari iss chuppi ko suunte hue
Aise hi tumhare saath chalna chahti hun
Iss safar ke ant tak aur aage bhi...

My last day at Praxis

2007-01-22T21:04:00.000+04:00

My last day at Praxis was a very special one. None of my team members left me alone even for 5 minutes, except for the time when I was busy with my last day formalities. Thanks a lot Team 2. I will really miss each and every one of you. I have seen many people leave the organization but none got such a grand farewell.

My last day started with a final login into the MIS. Then I went to the third floor where Shraddha and Mala were sitting. We chatted for some time before I met the HR lady. She gave me some forms to fill, which I did. Like a very loyal employee of the company, she tried retaining me till the very last minute offering me positions in other departments in the same organization. But I had made my decision.

After filling in the forms, I was once again with Mala and Shraddha. We were mainly discussing the new project at Praxis and the new seating arrangement. It was not very different for Mala and Shraddha, except for the floor, so it didn’t make much difference to them. But it was very different from the place where we were seated first when the office was shifted Mahakali. That place was heaven. The whole team had its own corner and the interaction amongst the team members was great.

Ok, coming back to my last day description, after chatting with Mala and Shrads, I moved downstairs to the 2nd floor to my own sweet seat. I was there to copy a few songs in my MP3 player (Shh! Don’t tell this to the networks guys.).

Later I searched for Himanshu. Being my project manager, he was the first in the list who had to sign my papers. He kept the papers with him and said that he would return them to me in some time. I went back to my seat and started copying songs again. Subroto came in then. He was quite surprised that I was leaving. He said that he didn’t even know that I had resigned. Ok! That was news to me. I thought every body in the team was aware of my departure. But, maybe, I was wrong. We spoke for some time discussing my resignation and new organization. After he left, I continued copying songs again, as if that was my assignment for the day.

Some time later was treat time. No, not a very happy moment for me as I was the one who was giving the treat. I took my team to Foodland, a restaurant just opposite the office building.
In the restaurant, we were busy clicking photographs first as I wanted to capture these last moments with my lovely team members. Sachin trying to hide his paunch, Vipul trying to give different expressions, Shraddha ever ready with her ‘Cheese’ smile, Imran just trying to be himself…and me, trying to smile and laugh outside, while I was a little unhappy inside….my camera captured it all. And yes, I can’t miss Remy who was so unsure about who was giving him a treat, me or Sachin M. (Sachin M’s treat was going on at the other table, and dear Remy didn’t find a place there.) Vipul was determined to click Saira’s one good snap, which he did (after a few tries though). And last but not the least, my dear ‘late lateef’ Subbu….my camera was lucky enough to capture him in one photo at least and that too with a smile on his face (so unlike his other photos)

After lunch, Shraddha went to attend some training. So, I went to return Vincent’s pen drive which I had borrowed from him to take some personal data home. We started talking about my new job and openings elsewhere. Sachin also joined us later. I believe Vincent is of the types who like talking a lot. But later he changed the topic to product development. (Ok, that’s not my domain!) But still, like a good conversant that I am, I kept saying something. We spoke for a long time before I realized that I had to collect my exit forms from Himanshu.

After Himanshu signed my forms, I took signatures from various other department heads. Then I went to the Premier House office to take account department’s head signature and my relieving letter. When I got the letter and the signature, I went and met Samrat who was in Premier House office. He was surprised to know that it was my last day there. But at the same time, he was happy for me. Amrish also came in after some time. I spoke with both of them for some time and then left for Mahakali office.

I had some beautiful surprises waiting for me when I returned to Mahakali office. My lunch group gifted me a book (Ok, I haven’t started it yet, but plan to do that soon.) We clicked photographs and they wished me luck for my new endeavors.

Then was my team’s time. Every one was present there. Those 40-50 minutes will always remain unforgettable in my life. I was asked to say a few lines on each one of them.
Ok, so if that wasn’t enough, here’s a testimonial for each one of you.

1. SHRADDHA: Obviously, I have to start with my wonderful friend. With a beautiful, warm smile, she had welcomed me into the team. She did seem of the serious types in the start. Only later did I get to know what a mischievous person she is. But yes, she is always very serious about her work. A safe player, she is not the one who likes taking chances or encourages risks. Quite unlike me. Still, don’t know how, we always had something or the other to talk about…and that too something interesting. Shraddha, do you want me to say this? Yes friends, with me around, she did something, which she would otherwise term as "illegal". I know Shrads, you’ll miss me for that. Hehe. And I am sure you wouldn’t do that "crime" with anyone else.

2. MALA: Her first impression was of a very introvert girl. But later I realized what a joy she is to be with. A very fun loving girl, her life seems to be very interesting and adventurous to ‘seedhe-sadhe’ me and Shrads. She did inspire us to live a small part of our lives independently, right Shrads? But we are still in Mumbai, still living with our families. Not that we regret it, but that makes us feel that we are missing something in our lives. I admire her unique style of talking, where she states every word very clearly. Late sittings, Mala busy at work, her multitasking, walk by the beach, and the anger she showed when she was not given a chance to bat, I’ll miss that all.

3. DENISE: Naughty grand mother was the first thing I told Shrads after we spoke with Denise for the first time. I always enjoyed looking at her expressions. Ya, I did make her conscious a few times. Hehe. I admire her conversation skills. She always finds a topic which the other person can talk about.

4. AMIT SHARMA: Oh God! Hehe. I haven’t had any major problems with him at any time. Yes, did crib some times, to realize later that it was only the project’s demand. But yes, he did make us wait sometimes for no reason at all. And this was when I had just joined the company. That didn’t give a good impression about the company’s work culture. But then, there I was, successfully completed two projects, which were very interesting.

5. SHAHNAWAZ: His big size did scare me in the start, but later realized, he is like any other 25 year olds, or rather just out of college types. I always liked his sense of humor, sometimes those were PJs though. But I enjoyed them. What I didn’t like about him was that he would behave like a class monitor and not a manager at times. But then that’s ok. I guess he is learning the traits of management.

6. SACHIN T: Ok, don’t know if he would like it or not, but I would say this is a compliment, that he was always a father figure to me. Maybe because, I heard him talk to his 2 year old kid, and even I felt like a 2 year old then. The other reason would be that I never saw him lose his temper, unlike all others who did lose their tempers at some point of time. A very composed person that he is, he has a one pitch voice. He can never lower his volume. Always interested in gossiping, he himself does’t know to gossip. Work wise, I learnt a lot about the dos and don’ts of the project.

7. VIPUL: The other person whose sense of humor I like a lot is Vipul. He is full of ideas, ideas that sound interesting, ideas that sound workable, but…… Ok, he has a wonderful family, and just like him, his wife also loves talking. Not sure if his daughter does, coz she didn’t seem interested in talking to anyone when we went for the picnic. Vipul, thanks for the picnic. It was a wonderful experience.

8. SUBROTO: Attitude bhai! Blacks and denims guy. But yes, he looks very smart in formals. In the start, he seemed like a ‘satka hua khopdi’. But then, he took feedback positively and changed accordingly. That’s what I liked in him. I liked his calling me Nattu as that used to remind me of my college days where my friends used to call me Nattu.

9. TUSHAR: Don’t know why, in the start I used to think that he is a fresher and would take time in getting used to the work. But he picked up things pretty fast. What I like in him was that he has not lost his innocence. But at the same time, I do not like his sarcastic remarks. His gujju accent, asking meanings of some English words, loyalty at work, and helping nature makes him a person any girl would love to be with.

Ok, I could write about these people, no more. I guess that should be enough. And whatever you all said about me, I have taken the feedback, but I guess I don’t need to work on anything as those were all compliments. Thank you Team 2.

me me me...

2006-05-23T13:52:00.000+04:00

It’s been long since I have written. Now I wish to write something about myself which I myself don’t understand. I am a very moody person and many a times do many crazy things just because I am in a mood to do that. People do call me mad at those times. But, I know that once I do what I want to, I am happy.

But there is this feeling which I don’t understand…it’s like…the first second I wish to run away from wherever I am at that time. The next second I wish to stay there. Third second, I wish to go far far away…..fourth second I want to go home….fifth second, I want to be with loved ones….the next second I want to be alone….next second, I wish to eat lots…but don’t feel the same in the next second. I mean its something like…I am not happy with whatever I do at that moment but am unaware of what would make me happy. I really hate when such a time comes. There are lots of question marks. Nothing convinces me then…..No material….no person….just nothing.

Weird….isn’t it? Does anyone else feel the same?

Are ghosts really there????????

2006-02-24T14:43:00.000+04:00

‘Ghost Stories of Shimla Hills by Minakshi Choudhary’. Just read some ghost incidents in Shimla as narrated by local residents and visitors there. A churail walking right besides you, an eerie feeling occurring without any reason, you see some figure in the 1st second that disappears in the 2nd, hear some conversations but you don’t see anyone there, some strange looking person calling out your name …..so many more. Do all these things actually happen? Have what the people narrated, their real experiences, their imaginations or is it simply made up? But on second thoughts, why will they make up such stories? Maybe for its sheer excitement. No one knows and I am one of those 'no one'.

Even I can narrate one such story. Although it is a very lame one compared to others’ experiences. I was 9-10 years old then and was located in Delhi. We (my family) had to go to an aunt’s place for mata ki chauki. For people who don’t know, its full night kirtan and pooja of Goddess Durga. It was held in a big tent put up on an open ground which was at a distance of two minutes from my aunt’s house. By 2-3am I was feeling very sleepy, as expected. I decided to go to my aunt’s place to catch up with some sleep. I walked down the empty, dark and deserted lane with my cousin. While going, I heard some chham chham of anklets. I was surprised to hear it at 2am coz no one else had left the chauki. It was only me and I obviously hadn’t expected anyone, especially a girl walking there in the middle of the night. The sound was coming from somewhere very close but I didn’t see anyone in front of or behind us. I wasn’t scared but surprised. They say na ‘Innocence is a bliss’. I hadn’t heard any such stories of ghosts or churails before. But not that I didn’t know about them. My cousin told me that a churail walks in those lanes every night. I do not know how much of this is true. Was my elder cousin just trying to scare and make fun of her younger cousin? I don’t know.

English Language

2006-02-23T10:55:00.000+04:00

“Are you very proud of what you did?” asked the angry principal to a class 2 student. Very innocently he said “Yes”. Said the principal “Ok, then you deserve a punishment. Show me your knuckles.” The impeccant boy did that. *Snnnnaaaaaaaaaaapp* He got one blow with a cane stick on his knuckles. Later, he was in tears.

In the evening when he went back home, his mother could see his red eyes and asked him what had happened. This is what the small boy narrated of what had happened. “I and my friend had a small argument over something. I hit him slowly, but he lost balance and fell. He got hurt. Then the matter was taken to the principal. She asked me if I was proud of what I did. I said yes. Then, she hit me hard with her cane stick. Mummy, what does PROUD mean?” Listening to his innocent question, his mother had tears in her eyes. She hugged him tight. Later, she explained him the meaning of the word. She didn’t know whom to blame. Her kid, who had hit the other boy or the principal who used her vocabulary without knowing what age boy she was speaking with.

The boy was a confident boy. Later, he determined to have a very good vocabulary. He worked towards it. He read and read and read. He read everything he could put his hands on, newspapers, magazines, novels, just everything.

He hadn’t seen any English movie when he was in school. The other thing that influenced him to have a complete control over English language is Amitabh Bacchan. In the movie Abhimaan, he has a dialog, “Am I supposed to know everything that happens to everyone in this house?” He spoke this statement confidently and in a very fast pace. This did influence the small boy and he worked harder.

This boy, today 25, actually did what he determined. He has a very good fluency and vocabulary. He is my sweet brother.

Hats off to his determination!

Surprise Surprise Surprise

2006-01-29T22:40:00.000+04:00

*Tring Tring*rang the phone. I had just entered office. I picked up the phone and said "Hello". The person on the other end said "Hi, I am K here." I had seen Mumbai's number on my phone before picking it up. I was surprised and said "What are you doing here? Are you in Mumbai? You told me that you will come only in May. No, you are kidding. You are not in Mumbai."

K is a very dear friend of mine. We were in the same college. We stayed in the same house for almost two years when we were in college. We are very close. She had gone to USA last year to do MS. But, we were in constant contact. I used to feel very happy whenever I met her online. We knew a lot about each other, thanks to Yahoo messenger and e-mails.

Over the phone, she said "I am in Mumbai. I wanted to give you a surprise by directly coming to your place. But that did not happen. So, I finally decided to call you up." I was so happy to hear her voice. It had been a long time since I had spoken to her. Immediately we fixed Sunday as the meeting day.

Sunday was fun. I was with my very sweet and dear friend. She had come to my place. We spoke without a single moment of pause. I served her with some Panjabi delicacies which she used to miss alot.

Later we went out shopping. She shopped a lot.

Then it was time for us to say Bye to each other. We didn't want to but had to. She left after that.

Home Alone

2006-01-13T22:59:00.000+04:00

Friday was the day, I was longing for....to be home alone. Just wanted to spend some time with my own self, doing stuff what I want to do, not what others want me to do. Just stop thinking and relax.
Home alone to me means doing a lot of stuff for which I don't get time in my normal routine. It means talking to my own self, analyzing my own thoughts, think of some special moments, listening to old hindi songs, cooking my favourite dinner, singing, dancing, drawing, writing poems or just anyting, doing something creative, and sleeping.

Usually I don't get time for all this. Usually its just my computer, my friends and me in the office and TV, kitchen, computer, and my bed at home. But this was the day where I had around 12 hours with myself.....

What did I do?hmmm......12 hours seemed too less for all that I wanted to do, but wanted to utilize it to the best.

It was 9am. I wanted to sleep more. But thought, I wouldn't have much time for anything else if I would spend so much time sleeping. So, I decided to wake up. Did a little cleaning of the house.But i didn't want to dedicate much time to household chores. And so, I turned on my computer. I wanted to check my e-mails. Any new job offers, any long distant friend's mail, anyone online. But no one was online. A few e-mails. And then loud music. I am not the loud music types, but was still in the hangover of the previous night's party that I wanted to dance more. But my feet refused to move. They were paining like hell. How clever of me. I had the brains to dance for hours together with those heels. But even that night was fun. And I obviously had to look good. The body ache was a small price for that.

So I was there, sitting in front of my computer and listening to loud music. Then, I thought of removing my sketch book and colors and do some drawing. In that paints bag, I found a candle making kit which I had bought long back and had forgotten about. I removed it and read the instructions. The wax had to be melted. So I sat on the slap in the kitchen with all the accessories required. I heated up the wax, added color to it and then put it in the mould. It sounds very simple....and It was actually not very difficult. The only difficult part was to remove the air gaps from the wax, which i was not very successful at. I made 4 candles. One in shape of a bell, one in shape of a star, the third one was in shape of a wrapped gift and fourth one was some round design. The star and the gift wrap shaped candles looked very good with the air gaps but the bell and the design didn't. So I was 50% successful.

Then I went and opened my sketch book. Drew a very beautiful drawing. I had found my lost colors and brushes and was so happy to use them. Red, blue, yellow, my favourite pink, black and all other colors. The music was on throughout. Loud music.

After drawing, like a small kid I took snaps of all that I had made that day. The candles, the drawings and the soft toys that I have with me.

In the meanwhile, as I was doing all this, I was constantly thinking about something or the other. Some beautiful memories, some very close people, and that someone special....

Then I thought, I had time to sleep and dream. So, took a small nap. Woke up....Had to cook dinner. Cooked something that took my least time in the kitchen. And then started watching TV.

And then the door bell rang.....my Home Alone day had ended. But I was happy as I could make the most out of that day.

Punjabi wedding

2005-12-28T13:42:00.000+04:00

Many of my friends keep telling me “Whenever you get married, please invite us.” Not just because, they want to attend MY wedding, but they want to see a Punjabi wedding. Punjabi marriages are very different from all other marriages with lots of customs and ceremonies. There is lots of sajana savarna, nach gana, masti mazzak, ched chad, and so much more.

Recently I got a chance to attend a cousin brother’s wedding. I reached there 2 days before the wedding.

The first night was sangeet and mehendi night. Ladies were singing, dancing, and applying mehendi on their hands. Both their hands were all filled and designed with the beautiful black color. We had a great time.

The next day, that is one day before the marriage, I woke up early. Not because I had to do some work, but because everyone else was awake. Got ready, had breakfast…..and then was time for the people from girl’s side to come over to the boy’s place for shagun. So all the elders were downstairs doing the ceremonies. The boy was supposed to go last. And we were there upstairs, teasing the would be bride-groom. He was so nervous, excited, he had so many mixed feelings.

We were five of us with the dulha. We didn’t let him be alone or in peace even for a single moment. In Punjabi weddings, there is a person called sawala. A sawala is a person who is always there with the bride groom. He does not leave him alone till the wedding. In this wedding, the sawala was a sardar. And he was the funniest part of the wedding. He had come from the land of Indian beauties, the sonni sonni kudiyan. He had come from Punjab and did not approve of any beauty in Gujarat.

So, we were there, harassing the poor dulhe raja. He didn’t have an option but to bear the harassments coz he could not go anywhere else. But, in a way he was enjoying all the teases and harassments. He was blushing, and was eagerly waiting for the his wedding.

Finally, he was called downstairs. There was some puja after that. Then was the chance of the saalis (bride’s sisters) to harass our bechara dulhe raja. But I am sure he was enjoying that as he forgot all his other relatives. After everything was over, lunch was served. The menu of the lunch included all Punjabi items. It included dal makhani, mix vegetables, dahi bhalle, puri, rice, gulab jamun, salad, and Punjabi achar. Yummy….

Then we took rest for some time. In the evening, we were supposed to go the bride’s place for shagun. (Oops! Not sure if this custom is called shagun or something else.) So, we were all there witnessing the sajna savarna of the girl. Its like…the bride groom’s mother, sisters, bhabhis all go the girl’s place and along with them they take all gold jewelry, a very heavy red or dark pink dupatta, and the make up kit. The girl sits there in a plain saree or salwaar kameez. And all start to decorate her. here, The poor girl was getting so nervous when all started pouncing on her. Someone putting the necklace around her neck, other one putting bangles, some other person putting payal, someone applying lipstick on her lips, somebody else would be applying nail polish on her nails….and that poor girl just sat there. She couldn’t even say anything. We (me and my jodidaars) just couldn’t help laughing. It actually was very hilarious.

After decorating her, her sisters and bhabhis took her back to her room. We followed her there. She looked so relieved. But we, the devilish ones, didn’t let her relax. We started teasing her. “Hmm….so you are desperately waiting for tomorrow, just like our bhaiya. You must be missing him, right.” “hehehehahahahohohohahahehehehahohohohooohoohahahahoha”. She didn’t mind it. She was actually missing him. As expected.

Then we went back home. Now was the real fun part of the day. There is a very funny tradition, wherein the groom’s father throws the groom out of the house and the groom goes away somewhere. Vo roothke chala gaya. And he said ( as a part of the tradition) that he doesn’t want to marry. Then the whole baraat goes and searches him. The funny part is that the baraatis go with all the band baja to search him. We were all dancing when we were going there. Hehe…(Actually, these days this custom is done just for the heck of it. It is pre decided where the boy will go and hide.) So, we reached there. It was some house in the neighborhood. Then we searched for him in the whole house. The sawala was there with him. I saw a small girl coming out of a room. I suspected that he would be there. Went in. The room was dimly lit. I could see someone standing next to the cupboard. But he didn’t look like the groom. I couldn’t even find the switch board. On a closer look, I could determine that that someone was the sawala, the sardar’s pagdi helped me recognize him. Hehe. Then I correctly assumed that the groom also has to be here. He had actually gone behind the cupboard. But yes, I found him. Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! We brought him out. The whole crowd was then surrounding him. All trying to convince him to come back home. But he would not listen. He was just doing natak. Hehe. The sawala was like…. “No, he won’t agree.” Giving all sort of reasons for him to disagree. Then finally, somehow he was convinced (had to be, hehe). Then we returned home along with him and had dinner. Then was mehendi time. All bhabhis and sisters put mehndi on the guy’s palms and imprinted it on the wall behind him. After that, his feet were also colored, including the nails. That was so uproarious. The sawala fed him food later. He could wash his hands and feet only after an hour. So it was all orange orange. Hehe.

The following day was actually the most awaited day, the wedding day. There was nothing, I mean no ceremonies that morning. Only the real sister and real bhabhi, if any, went to the girl’s place for “chunni chadai”. The girl was supposed to wear that dupatta over her wedding dress, whatever that be. Be it a salwaar kameez, a sharara, a lehnga or a saree.

We were doing all time pass that morning. Slept properly. Then came the evening. The baraat was supposed to leave at 6pm, IST. That meant it should have left latest by 8pm, which it did. The baraat left at 7.30pm. hehe. I was dressed in a beautiful blue sharara, tied a bun of my hair. I had worn a very beautiful diamond set. Others were also looking OK, obviously.

Then went the baraat. All dancing, one uncle taking good care that the guys dance in the front and girls behind them and they don’t get mixed up. He knew a fact which, he thought, we didn’t. (The guys were all drunk, shhh….) ok, but we were separately dancing and enjoying. We danced till the end of the lane. Then we all went and sat in the bus, that was arranged to go to the venue. The guys were dancing in the bus also. They didn’t get a place to sit. Hehe. It was a mini bus and all could not fit in. So the guys had to stand. But it was a very short distance. Hardly 10 minutes. The bus halted some 100 meters away from the venue. The baraat was supposed to dance and cover the remaining distance. We all started dancing again. They were all Punjabi songs. Girls wanted some Hindi or English numbers, but the guys wanted Punjabi songs. So, it was 70% Punjabi songs and 30% Hindi or English ones. But it was all fun.

And finally when we were about 10 meters away from the entrance gate. Uncle could help no more. Girls and guys started dancing together. Hehe. They started flirting. Ched chad. (within limits, of course) There is another ritual that when the ladke wale reach the ladki wale’s place (now, venue). This ritual is called “Milni”. Here the girls and guys respective relatives hug each other and exchange gifts or garlands. Like the bride’s and groom’s mothers, their fathers, their brothers, sisters…. hugged each other and exchanged gifts.

Then, finally at 11pm, we entered the venue. Half the wedding attendees had eaten their dinner and were about to leave. They left after immediately blessing the bride and the groom. So, it happens such in Punjabi weddings that the reception is held before marriage. Only the very close relatives are there to witness the actual wedding, the pheras.

We ate dinner. The ched chad of the girls and the guys continued. Photographs were clicked of everyone as they went on the stage and blessed the couple. So it was funny to see them continuously smiling. Ye mama, ye chacha, ye bhua, ye bhua ka beta, ye cousin, ye family friend, ye ye, ye vo…..the guys or the girl’s mother was introducing the other to them. (As if they would remember all the faces.) Then the pheras happened after 12. Everyone was dead by then. We were all awake for so long. It took around 2 hours for the marriage.

I was watching all that with half eyes closed. We left the next morning. So couldn’t witness the customs that happen after marriage. The bride and the groom play some games, like searching for finger ring in a pan filled with milk. But, alas! I missed all that. But am happy that I made some good friends.

So, this was my trip to Baroda. Total fun.

My inner beast

2005-11-29T10:26:00.000+04:00

Your inner beast is a Bear. Your fierce side is
shown emotionally.

~The Good~ You're Caring, Down-to-Earth,
Considerate, etc...

~The Bad~ You are sometimes Moody, Snappish,
Overreacting, etc...

~People On Your Good Side~ Are smothered with
affection and attention.

~People On Your Bad Side~ Are avoided because you
are afraid and kept at arms length because you
are afraid you will let them hurt you again.

Your Inner Beast
brought to you by Quizilla

My 20th Birthday

2005-10-07T18:00:00.000+04:00

It was in the third year of college. It was my birthday. My family had to go to my native place because my uncle had passed away. I was staying with one Aunty of mine. Early in the morning, I went for a coaching class. I reached my class. But everything seemed so normal, as if it is just another day. No body approached me. None of them wished me in the start. One or two wished, who were not so close friends. I was so excited in the morning when I woke up, but everything was shattered when I reached my class. Not all my friends used to come for that class. So I thought things would be better when I reach college.

I felt really bad when all my close friends who were there at the class gave some reason or the other and said that they would go late to the college or wouldn’t go at all. I couldn’t have gone back to my Aunty’s place. I didn’t want to go to college alone. But still I went to college with a class mate. I was very disappointed and upset. I felt like crying. I just couldn’t believe that this was happening to me.

When I reached college, no body from my group had turned up. I felt very furious then. I actually felt like bashing somebody. But I didn’t want to create a scene there. I somehow controlled my emotions. It was then when a very dear friend came in the class. He wished me, sat beside me, and could see that I was upset. I told him how I felt and what was happening with me. So he, like a true friend, who he is, was with me throughout the day. He didn’t leave me alone for a single moment. I was glad that at least he was there.

Later another friend turned up. She wished me but then started with her work. I was again disturbed. But I decided to say nothing. Then after some time, this friend of mine also gave some excuse and left for home. But as I decided I didn’t say anything. But my dear friend didn’t leave me. He was there with me. Then came in one another very close friend. I told her how I felt. Then she was also with me throughout after that.

She said that they (my group) had plans of going for a movie, for which we need to go to a friend’s house first (the same friend who came and left from the college). I didn’t feel like going but still I went. I actually removed all my anger on my poor friend and she was there trying to pacify me. But I was really very angry. I went to her place.

And what was waiting for me was actually a surprise. It was a surprise birthday party planned for me. Just for me. Wow. They saw the smile on my face and I was happy for that surprise. Half the class was present there to celebrate my birthday. Everybody returned from the class in the morning and then left early from college just for the preparations of the party. My friend’s mom had baked a cake especially for me, especially for my birthday. I was so thrilled about the whole concept. One friend prepared noodles. The other one bought cutlets. We had a gala time there.

It was then that all started laughing at me. They all started imitating my expressions, my angry, frustrated, furious expressions. I joined them in their laughter. We played a few games including Antakshari. We had so much fun. All my friends were close to me then. They made me feel so special. I can never forget their gesture.

It was then time to leave. We walked till the closest station and on our way; I treated them with an ice-cream.

Hey friends, thank you so much for making my 20th birthday so memorable. I will never ever forget that day. Indeed, you all made me feel special. Very special….

What would I do without you?

2005-08-29T08:16:00.000+04:00

I need you in every step that I take,
I want you in every decision that I make
I want you to just walk besides me,
Holding my hands very tightly.

The trust that I see in your eyes now,
I want to see that always,
The love that I get from you now,
I want to get that always.

This thought keeps racing in my mind,
What would I have done without you?
I would not have been myself,
Had I lived my life without you.

Its only with you that I
feel secure and protected,
Its just your love dear
that I never suspected.

I love you
I love you with all my heart
Will always love you
Until from me, my life departs

My Personality

2005-08-24T15:59:00.000+04:00

Your #1 Match: ISFJ

The Nurturer
You have a strong need to belong, and you very loyal.A good listener, you excell at helping others in practical ways.In your spare time, you enjoy engaging your senses through art, cooking, and music.You find it easy to be devoted to one person, who you do special things for.
You would make a good interior designer, chef, or child psychologist.

What's" Your Personality Type?

Driving and me

2005-08-24T11:12:00.000+04:00

Three 12 year old kids were pedaling their cycles at around 10 in the night. Two boys and one girl. They saw a truck coming from the opposite direction. The first boy lost his balance and fell badly. He was quite ahead of the other two. The second boy too fell in a puddle a few meters behind the first boy. The girl was far behind from them, but she screamed and she fell too. She didn’t know why she fell. There was no reason for her to fall. The truck had gone, there was no puddle, and still she fell. The boys forgot about their injuries and burst out laughing. She said she got scared and since both of them fell, she also fell. Such a stupid reason…………. And all started laughing.

That shy and scared girl is me. I was always scared of cycling. I had never taken my cycle to the main road, and used to cycle only in the lanes. And that too, only when my bhaiya or papa used to be around.

Now, at the age of 23, I am still scared of cycling. I can never sit in the front seat of a two wheeler. But I always wanted to drive a four wheeler, a car. This was not a very great wish of mine. Just wanted to try it. I got a chance. I got keys of a friend’s car. I was very excited about driving the car. I wanted to put my hands on the steering.

I went and sat on the driver’s seat. But I didn’t know what to do after that. I didn’t know which is the clutch, which is the break and which is the accelerator. I didn’t know anything about changing the gears, when they should be changed, about the hand break. In short, I knew nothing, not even some of the terms. He told me everything. He gave me the theoretical knowledge about driving a car. Now I knew when and how the gears had to be changed, when to use the hand break, clutch, leg break and everything. Since I was interested, I learnt everything very fast. Since his car is new and he is possessive about it, he didn’t allow me to drive it. Obviously, no body would do that.

I then decided to join a driving school. I still have to do that. I have not approached any driving school.

Later once I went to meet another friend. His car is pretty old. He was driving and the road was empty. I told him that I wished to drive it. He immediately agreed. I went and sat on the driver’s seat. I DROVE. I drove the car for about 4 meters. Ya, I know that’s not great, but for me, it is. Later he took the car to another empty road where I drove for about 100 meters. I drove it in the first gear only, but it was fun. I drove a car. wow. It made me feel so happy. I started the car properly, drove straight……….Ya, my friend had kept his hand on the steering, but still………He kept encouraging me that I was driving properly. He told me when to change the gear. I drove on second gear just for 3-4 meters, then returned to first gear. It was all so exciting. But I couldn’t manage to stop the car properly. It jerked a little before it could stop finally.

But all in all, it was fun. I enjoyed. I thanked my friend and left. I have now decided to learn driving…soon, very soon.

Suchitra

2005-08-22T11:51:00.000+04:00

Saw the movie Black. How beautifully it has shown the teacher student relationship. Awesome. That reminds me of girl called Suchitra. She is a dumb and deaf girl. She was my mother's student. My mom is a teacher.

A tall and healthy girl, wearing a long skirt and a loose top stood in front of me. I just couldn't help noticing her heavy body. Actually, I was a little scared of her huge body. I also noticed that she walked like drunk person and her left hip was noticiably bigger than the right one.

"This is Suchitra.", said my mother. She was introducing me to her. Then I saw something which was so attractive, so magnetic. I saw her smiling. Wow. She smiled like a two year old. Her smile looked so pure, so innocent, so relaxing. Her face said it all that she has no worries, no botherations and is not concerned about the outside world. She was happy in her own shell. When my mother introduced me to her, like a very well mannered child, she brought her hand forward and shook hands with me. I was touched. She was so happy and so excited to see me. Honestly speaking, it wasn't the same with me. I was a little reluctant to talk to her, or maybe I didn't know how to do that. My mother noticed it. She didn't like it, and took her away.

My mother used to talk about her at home. She was a 17 year old girl then. None of the normal school would give her admission and would ask her parents to take her to some special school. They had tried that before, but Suchitra had not liked it there. She wanted to study with normal students, and finally they managed to convince the principal of the school, where my mother used to teach. She was admitted in Class I. My mother was her class teacher. She had never taught such special students before, but wanted to try. She was succeeding in the same. Suchitra was so happy with her new teacher that her parents approached my mother for private tutions as well. My mother was unwilling in the start, but later agreed.

Now, my mother started teaching her everyday, in school, as well as at home. "Kabbta, Kabbta", she used to call my mother (her name is Kavita). My mother did not know the sign language, and learnt it from Suchitra's mother. Initially she needed her mother's help to convey something, but later could do it herself. My mother used to explain things to her with the help of her fingers and her eyes. Suchitra knew a little bit of lip reading too.

Suchitra was a very good and obedient student. This is the reason why my mother liked teaching her. She loved studying, but was a very slow learner. My mother used to get irritated at times, but she didn't give up. She taught her subjects like Maths, Environmental Studies, English, and Art. I had seen her drawings. They were like any other student in class I.

Although, it took her two years to get promoted to class II, Suchitra, her parents, my mother, none of them lost hope. They knew she could do it. My mother taught her till she passed Class III, but could not continue after that. It was because we were shifting to a different city. She and her parents were very sad. They didn't want to lose such a good teacher, but couldn't help the situation.

Suchitra, later finished her studies till class V, but couldn't study after that. It was becoming very difficult for her. Then her parents put her in slow learners school, and she has now managed to pass Class X at the age of 25. Her studies included some special subjects like art.

My mother is happy with her accomplishment. Suchitra will always have a special place in her heart. She will always be special to her teacher, and am sure that this teacher will be special to Suchitra and her parents as well.

Hats off to Suchitra, her parents, and my mother....................

26th, the terror.....................................

2005-08-02T10:06:00.000+04:00

26th of July- It seemed like a normal day when I woke up that morning. I left for office. I was busy with my office work. Somewhere in the afternoon, I decided to take a break and move out. It was raining very heavily then. I couldn't even manage to go across the road. The torrential rains were accompanied with ferocious winds. So, i decided to go back to the office.

I love the rains. Like a kid, I wanted to get wet in the rains. I thought I will enjoy the rains in the evening while going back home. But I realized it later, I just couldn't go home that evening. The roads were all flooded and there was no way I could have reached home. So I decided to spend the night in the office, which I did. 70% of the staff stayed in the office that night. We surfed and found out that this was all because of high tide and heavy rains occuring simultaneously. Heavy rains were forecasted for the next two days also.

Next morning, I and a friend took a public bus and reached home with no problem. There was no water, no electricity at home. Phones were not working. There was no mineral water available in the shops. Later that evening, electricity resumed. The first thing I did was to switch on the TV and started a news channel. Only then did I realize how bad the situation was. People were dying. There was so much damage occuring to their houses, their belongings, their loved ones.

"Landslides kill many." "People washed away in the forceful water." "Many electrocuted." "Many missing." "Houses washed away." "Many die in their cars because of suffocation." These were the kind of news, which we got to hear. It was all so so scary. People had seen dead bodies floating in water. Many saw the lower level of their buildings fully washed away.

My fast paced Mumbai had suddenly come to a standstill. Mumbaikars were never frightened of the rains. But now, they were. They were not ready to move out of their houses. Fear could be seen on the faces of fearless Mumbaikars. But their spirit was still noteworthy. They helped whomever and however they could. Many were stuck in traffic for hours together without any food and water. Local residents helped them with buscuits, some snacks and water. Many saved lives. Hats off to my Mumbai...................

Its been a week now and the situation has still not improved for many. Many places still don't have any electricity, water, or food. They are blaming the government saying that they are not providing them with any help. But people are trying to help others in whatever possible way.

"I love the rains. I love the rains. I love the rains." I used to say this always. But now I ask myself "Do I still love the rains?", which has taken life of so many fellow beings..................

The Prophet

2005-06-28T23:55:00.001+04:00

Just read a book

It says that Almustafa had waited twelve years in the city of Orphalese for his ship that was to return and bear him back to the isle of his birth. His ship came and took him back. Along with him, he took back the memeories he has of that place. He thought of the hard ships when he was there.

When he returned to his home town, Almitra, a beautiful lady who had helped him to return asked him about his experiences. She asked him to speak about love, and this is what he replied

"When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.

And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

And when he speaks to you believe in him.

Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the
north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.

Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.

Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your
tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,

So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in
their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.

He threshes you to make you naked.

He sifts you to free you from your husks.

He grinds you to whiteness.

He kneads you until you are pliant;

And then he assigns you to his sacred fire,

that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may
know the secrets of your heart, and in that
knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace
and love's pleasure.

Then it is better for you that you cover your
nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,

Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but
not all of your laughter, and weep,
but not all of your tears.

Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but
from itself.

Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;

For love is sufficient unto love.

When you love you should not say,'God is in my heart,'
but rather, 'I am in the heart of God.'

And think not you can direct the course of love, for love,
if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself.

But if you love and must needs have desires,
let these be your desires:

To melt and be like a running brook that sings
its melody to the night.

To know the pain of too much tenderness.

To be wounded by your own understanding of love;

And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

To wake up at dawn with a winged heart and give
thanks for another day of loving;

To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ectasy;

To return home at eventide with gratitude;

And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your
heart and a song of praise upon your lips."

And then Almitra asked him about marriage.
To this he replied,

"You were born together, and together you
shall be for evermore.

You shall be together when the white wings of
death scatter your days.

Aye, you shall be together even in the
silent memory of God.

But let there be spaces in your togetherness.

And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another, but make not a bond of love:

Let it rather be a moving sea between the
shores of your souls.

Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.

Give one another of your bread but eat
not from the same loaf.

Sing and dance together and be joyous,
but let each one of you be alone,

Even as the strings of the lute are alone though they quiver
with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.

For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.

And stand together yet not too near together:

For the pillars of the temple stand apart,

And the oak tree and the cypress grow not
in each other's shadow."

How beautifully and correctly the prophet had understood the meaning of love and marriage. Simply too good.

5 hours in a woman's mind

2005-06-28T09:26:00.000+04:00

Sara was at home that day. She had waited for 3 long months to see her love, who had gone out for some official purpose. But when the day started, she could wait no longer and eagerly awaited the evening. She was so excited that she took an off that day. She had already thought of all the preparations to be done for that evening, and now started working towards it.

She cleaned the house, cooked her special preparations. She knew what Aryan likes for dinner.
She decorated the table. Since afternoon, she was ready for that long awaited dinner. She had kept two very beautiful candles on the dining table.

She finished all that she had to do, but time was passing real slowly. She sat down and switched on the television set. She was just fidgeting with the remote control, surfing through all the channels, without noticing what the channels were showing. She could not think of anything else. My love, my Aryan would be home, after three long months, which seemed like three decades. It is so difficult to live without him. She had missed him so much.

She felt as if the time is running real slow, looking at her watch every half a minute. She wanted evening to come very soon, but also realized that it will take its own sweet time to come, and knew that it is still five hours away. She switched off the TV, and sat besides the window, where they had spent hours together. She saw outside the window. It was a beautiful rainy day. She saw green trees everywhere. It was so pleasant. She saw children playing in the water. They were getting wet and enjoying the rains. That reminded her of the day when she was with Aryan. Aryan was taking all the care not to get wet. She was in her own childish mood and wanted to get wet and play in the rains. She was going out from under the umbrella, and Aryan was pulling her back in. She just didn’t listen, snatched the umbrella from him and closed it. Finally Aryan realized that all his efforts would be in vain, and she wouldn’t listen. She started dancing and forced him to dance along. He had no choice but to dance. And then they were singing, dancing and playing in the rains. He didn’t say it but he too enjoyed it. She thought of all that, giggled, shook her head and tapped her forehead. In a second’s time, she thought of all the times when she had troubled him and Aryan always used to bear all her silly behaviors.

She just couldn’t help smiling. Each and every thought of Aryan brought a beautiful smile on her face. Anybody could have noticed her happiness. She thought of everything, she could about her husband. She thought of all the lovely moments she had spent with him. She went down the memory lane and remembered the time when she first met him. How they became great friends, they could talk about anything, from sports to politics to relationships. They were so comfortable with each other. And later, when both of them had realized that its something more than friendship. She was waiting desperately for him to propose to her. And, finally the moment had come. He told her those three golden words, which made her feel top of the world. His words were echoing in her ears. She was waiting since a long time to hear that, and that moment had finally come. She was so happy. She could hear nothing else that day. She could think of nothing else that day.

Then they started meeting more frequently. Both of them now knew, yes, this is the one. The smile on their faces and the twinkle in their eyes, when they were together could be seen by everyone. And anybody could say how happy they are when they are together. Along with the good moments they had spent together, she also thought of the bitter experiences they have had. But the clarification of the misunderstandings had only brought them closer. She was thinking all this, and just couldn’t help smiling.

She again looked at the watch. Oh! 2 more hours left. She returned to her dream world. She thought of the time, when he had first held her hand, when he touched her for the first time. It was as if she had skipped a heart beat. She had closed her eyes because she wanted to capture that moment and not let it go. She had never felt the same before. His touch was so different than others. Her body became numb for a few seconds; she forgot everything else. She even forgot what she was saying. As if he had pressed the mute button in her. His touch made her feel so special. It made her feel like a woman. She felt wanted. She felt yes, there is somebody in the world to whom she means a lot and this person means a lot to her. She felt as if she is in a different world and she could see nobody else other than him there. And she just didn’t feel like coming back to this real world.

She saw the watch again. It was just an hour for his flight to arrive. She began redoing her make-up. She wanted to look at her best, as if she is getting married again. She was dressed in her best dress. She sat in the car and started driving towards the airport. She stopped at a shop, bought some chocolates and started driving again. She was still smiling. She was very happy. She was going to meet that special person, who made her feel as if she is the happiest and the luckiest woman on the earth.

Finally, she reached the airport. After parking the car, she rushed towards the terminal. She was getting very impatient now. Her eyes were searching for Aryan. And just then her phone rang. It was Aryan. He informed her that he has reached and will be with her in a few moments. Wow. What else could she ask for? He is coming. He is coming. My love is coming. Oh God, what is taking him so long to come out? Where is he? ..................Oh my my………..there he comes. Aryan was perfectly dressed in his formal attire and had the looks of a very confident person. She saw him. Tears started pouring from her eyes. She was so happy……….she wanted to dance, sing, laugh, cry all at the same time. Aryan could see her happiness. Without her saying it, he knew how much she had missed him. He had missed her too, but not as much as a woman can miss a man, he thought……….

2005-06-17T22:33:00.000+04:00

Why I am so happy today.........................?

It was just another day when I woke up this morning. Followed the normal morning routine, dressed and left for office. I was waiting for the office bus. These days, every morning it seems, as if it will rain...with those dark clouds all over the sky...but as morning passes by, it becomes so sunny and the clouds disappear in such a way as if they were never there. So I thought it would be the same even today. I was feeling too lazy and sleepy early in the morning. As soon as I got into the bus, I slept. I was sitting near the window, with the window half open, half closed. Suddenly I felt the thanda thanda breeze over my face...wow...and then a drop of water. I opened my eyes to see that it was drizzling. Wow.....wow.....wow. I was so thrilled to see the rains............as if I was just waiting for them to arrive. It rained just for 5-7 minutes, but it was amazing. The sweet smell of the wet sand was driving me crazy.

Maybe this is why I am so happy. The sight of the first rain has made me happy today. How I wished to be in some hill station then. Just for some time. Whole day was too lazy. But a very happy day. I felt like sleeping, eating, singing, dancing, laughing, laughing, and laughing the whole day. Everybody could notice my happiness. It could be seen on my face.

Waiting for the next rains............